Christmas Movies

 

So, I've been getting a lot of stick for wanting to watch cheesy hallmark Christmas movies but when your only other choices are the one's your husband has laid out for you and they include "Munich", "Sin City", "Monsters Ball" and "All the Kings Men", I'll take the hallmark. At least they are happy. Totally predictable but in a way that can be so satisfying. Your brain doesn't need to work for a second. You can just relax and enjoy the ride.  And who doesn't like laughing at other people for being silly?

Right now the debate is between:

My choice: Recipe for a perfect Christmas. 

Derrald's choice: Bill & Ted's Bogus Adventure

 

When I asked if "Bill & Ted's" was at all Christmassy, I got "Um, YEAH, have you even seen it?!?!?!"...Um, no. I haven't and I feel pretty okay with that. However, marriage is compromise and next year I will be able to say "um, YES, I've seen it, and NO, we can not watch it..ever again".... I can say this because we are watching it. Sigh.


Merry Christmas Everyone!

The story of Derrald and the Horse

I know it's Christmas and I promise I will write another post to commemorate this time in all it's merriness, but I have a story to tell that can not wait. The story of Derrald and the Horse.

First of all, I need you to watch this commercial (pay particular attention to the end):

Not only is this commercial brilliant, it was the inspiration for Derrald's first "ride" on Tiny.

Tiny is a horse. My dad's horse. He's white, kinda like the one in the commercial. Tiny is not tiny at all. Tiny is big. He looks something like this:

Tiny likes carrots. And apples. And luckily, Derrald had both. So he could win the friendship of his steedy pal. A good start. What was to happen next was relatively simple:

Mount the horse.
Smile.
Stay on the horse.

Derrald thought he could do it. So he climbed the fence. Threw his leg over the animal and enjoyed the feeling of one-horse-power.

All was going merrily (as makes sense for the season) and Derrald even decided to impress us, calling on the aforementioned commercial... "ladies, i'm the man your man could smell..." and then it happened, just a small motion really, but Derrald's backside started to slide.

He was sliding bum first off the massive animal. I wish I could say it bucked him. I wish I could say it reared up it's front legs and it was a struggle between horse and man, a fight for the life. But it wasn't. It was Tiny being a perfectly normal and Derrald's bottom being unusually heavy and slidey.

"Ladies, I'm the man your man could smell liiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiike".

 

Mud.

Derrald has only ridden a horse twice in his life. Both times he's fallen off. Derrald is NOT a good horse rider but he's a very good horse fall-er. And darn, if he didn't smell SO bad all the way home. We climbed in the car to get that boy to a shower and he uttered "Ladies, what you are smelling right now is me". I was going to describe it but it's Christmas. So I'll save you. Suffice to say it was BAD.

Huh-larious. Maybe next year will be the year Derrald doesn't fall off a horse? 6 days and counting...

Update from Derrald

Blog friends,

I have been absent too long from the blog. I've been in dissertation world, and I've scrambled to start getting materials together to try and get a job. Early this week I went to Miami to present (briefly) my dissertation and meet other candidates graduating this year. It was a good time but oh so much work. Hour for hour it would be easier to shovel coal in a mine that schmooze with random accounting geniuses. I had a suite in a nice hotel to myself, awesome for about an hour. I should have listened to Hayley and smuggled her in.

So, sorry that I've been missing. Poor H has had to carry the blog load for too long. Hopefully things will start coming together in the coming months and I can blog it up a bit more. And hopefully I can start cashing in some of those accounting checks to come visit you all. I want to trip it up, I'm getting very excited for the change in scenery that going to SF over Christmas will bring.

One final note. I just made silver medallion status on Delta. This meaningless distinction has made me happier than words can describe.

Love,

Derrald

We're the producers?

I came across this footage the other day and I couldn't help myself. I thought it'd be fun to share. Such foolishness. It's Lisa Vampa and myself after finding out we had secured some funding to make "Finding Marilyn". We were so excited and so happy and so... silly. Haha. Neither one of us had any idea what we were doing or what we were getting ourselves into... but we were certainly going to give it our bestest and try to have fun with it ;)

Enjoy.

Wingman

Every girl needs a wingman. You know, for those special occasions, like, when she has a film festival to go to and she needs someone to sit through 28 short films over the period of 6 hours with her. 

Derrald is the best wingman. 

As previously mentioned, my short film "Finding Marilyn" screened at the Carrboro Film Festival this past Sunday and it was so much fun. The festival itself was a huge success. There were some great films made by local artists and it was such a pleasure to get to meet some of these folks as well as watch their work.

We had a full house.

 We had Q&A with the filmmakers. That's me. Far right.

And then possibly the best part of the evening, awards time!! "Finding Marilyn" did exceptionally well for it's first festival, taking home the awards for excellence in cinematography and for best film by a professional/emerging artist. I wish that other members of our cast and crew could have been there to enjoy the day and the validation that comes with being recognized.

Making a film, even if it is only 15 minutes long, takes a lot more work than you might think. It didn't help that I decided to create a production that involved artists from all over the world... where they were still located all over the world... but from conception to finish it took two years. Many people, friends really, gave their time willingly and FREEly. It would have been impossible without them.  You know who you are, THANK YOU.

Veterans Day

Georgio O'Keeffe "Oriental Poppies" 1928

Typically, when I hear the words "Veterans Day",  my mind wanders to images of poppies (paper or real), bayonets, and a bunch of old fellas dressed in their old uniforms sitting around chatting about hard times past... but this year, I am updating the image. I always felt a sense of respect concerning this day but now I feel connected. Veterans are not just "old fellas". They are also "young fellas". War is current. It's tentacles are long and far reaching, across seas and across time. We remember those that made it and those that didn't.

In New Zealand, we commemorate Anzac Day. It's pretty much the same thing as Veterans Day, or as they call it in the Commonwealth, "Remembrance Day"- just on a different day of the year. And we make cookies called "Anzac Biscuits". My heritage being what it is, I feel like Anzac Biscuits are appropriate on a day like today.  Unfortunately, with my husband flying to Utah for the BYU conference this weekend and the rest of my family scattered across 3 separate continents, I'm not sure who I'd be making them for.

Anzac Biscuits are said to have been made by soldier's wives during World War I. They were sent to the young men overseas as the ingredients didn't spoil easily and they travelled well. These days we send my brother boxes of Toffee Pops and Pineapple Lumps.

As I drink my delicious Starbucks Spiced Apple drink (oh so good), in the comfort of the bookstore, and reflect on how many times I've complained this week about my feet being sore and my back being sore and not having enough time to write and think and work on my projects because I work, wait for it.... a whole 4 days this week! ... I wonder if I even have a tenth of what it would take to be a woman in the early 1900's. When waitressing seems like "hard labor" I know I'm taking my life for granted.

 Here's to remembering all the men and women, young and old, who have fought for their lives, and for our rights, and because it was required of them. We remember you. We remember your families. We remember each other and our own imperfect humanity. We remember and we will remember. On Veterans Day. With poppies. Or cookies. Or maybe a story or two. I wish we would remember with lessons learned. With kinder hearts. Wiser hearts. Wiser minds. But we are human, and even that we fail to remember at times.

Finding Marilyn at the Carrboro Film Festival

Last week I got an email confirming that my short film "Finding Marilyn" will be making it's US debut here at the Carrboro Film Festival in North Carolina. I am so excited to be sharing this film with all our friends here and am keeping my fingers crossed that,with a little more effort on my part, it will not be the last screening here in the US.

Anyone close to me knows that I have been frustrated with myself for quite some time about not being proactive enough about my projects. I don't know why it takes me so long to get things done. Derrald says I am a "dreamer not a doer" and I'm inclined to believe him, based on my recent progress, however, there is a part of me that thinks "No! I AM a doer. I do things. I made a short film didn't I? Wrote it. Produced it. Filmed it. So I've been "out" of the doing phase for a little while... so what? Where is that girl that dreams things and then does them (even if she takes longer to do it than everyone else)?"

You see, I absolutely have the capacity to be a doer. It's just not really my natural state. It takes me longer to get there. Still, that girl, the one that dreams of doing and then sometimes actually does, she's here. I wrote in my journal today that the key is not to give up. That alone is a triumph in itself. Some of my projects have been going on so long it's embarrassing. But I am a Jannesen. No, a Stice. No, a Jannesen-Stice-Stice-Jannesen. Okay fine. It doesn't really matter what I am. The point I am trying to make is that I WILL get them done (eventually) because I have decided it.

I won't go all Oprah on you right now (sorry Mum). I will just leave you with an image of my poster, designed by my good friend and fellow filmmaker, Salvatore Castellana.

The Carrboro Film Festival is on November 21st. I'll let you know how it goes.

At the Office

The Stices enjoying an afternoon in their office (aka the balcony):

Anal Fin

If you laughed at the title of this posting, or at the picture directly below it (taken by Brendan) - you are a child. That's what I also told D and my brother when they decided to call their fake band "Anal Fin".

This posting is inspired by our visit to the Atlanta Aquarium during a visit with Brendan last month. Did you know the Atlanta Aquarium is the biggest in the World? Yup. And they have Whale Sharks in a big tank built by HomeDepo. Awesome.

There were many fishies. We touched a bunch of slimy things, and sticky things, and swimming things. Some were shaped like stars, some were tentacled, some were miniature sharks. None of them are in the following photo.

After our aquarium trip (did I mention we were there AN HOUR before it opened??) we made our way outside and tried to convince my brother he should run into the Coca-Cola museum and get himself some free soda. As part of the Share Program, Brendan, and his injured military buddies, get to go in for free!! I guess we shouldn't have used the word "run". He couldn't have run if he'd tried. However, we did get ourselves a little sip from a statue who was willing to share...

Salut! Cheers! Bottoms Up! 

Old Man Brother

It's a strange thing to see a strapping, young, 23 year old soldier walking with the stiffness and uncertainty of a 93 year old OLD man. It's even more strange when it's your brother.

He looks normal. Until he gets up and takes hold of his zimmer frame and tells you he still can't climb the stairs because he just doesn't have the strength. He LOOKS like he has the strength but I take his word for it. Shuffle Shuffle.

It was about a month ago now that Brendan fell 30-40 feet off a ridgeline in the mountains of Afghanistan and suffered severe spinal/neurological injuries. The first phonecall came while I was in Boston visiting my sister. Brendan had been injured. He was being evacuated to the hospital in Germany. It was bad. Concussion. His spine was damaged. We didn't know to what expect.

There is nothing worse than "not knowing". "Not knowing" allows for imagination. It allows for worst-case scenarios. It allows for uncertainty and fear.

What followed was an intense period of waiting as we each waited for our phones to ring and for updates to be given. The army/hospital would call my parents, my parents would call me and my sister, I would call my husband, he would call his family.

It was like we were all suspended on one, long, inhaled breath. But can he walk?

He could not.

At first.

But then, a little involuntary movement. In his sleep. The nurses saw it.

All the tests came back with positive results. Nothing severed or broken. A miracle. But he still couldn't move his legs and was having "seizures". He would be kept in Germany until they decided he was stable enough to be sent back to the US.

About to head off on her own big, adventure in Sudan, my sister decided a detour was necessary and went to stay with Brendan in Germany during some of the worst days of initial recovery. The effect of her visit on the spirits of my brother were visible to all the hospital staff. They were reflected in the improved state of my brother's health. The seizures abated and Brendan was given a departure date.

Family, in times of crisis, are essential and irreplaceable.

Back in the US there were more tests, more hospital exchanges but little by little (or rather a lot, depending how you look at it) Brendan has improved and recovered and is now at the Shepherd Hospital in Atlanta in the "Brain Injury" department as part of the Share program. A program constructed to help him get back to full capacity, mind, body and soul. He is loving it. They give him counseling for the PTSD, they are helping improve his cognitive skills (he said his brain is slow and he can't remember stuff), they are working with him physically - relearning how to walk, regaining strength and balance, they take him through ocupational therapy and make sure he can take care of himself. He's doing great.

I'm here because the hospital have asked that he have someone with him 24/7 and it's my turn. Mum has been with him for weeks and this week is my week. We've all had turns. Ashley went to him in Germany, Mum and Dad have been with him throughout his movements in the US, Amy has been with him for two visits, and we're even getting Derrald down this weekend.

With some time to reflect I have felt several things:

~ incredibly grateful for whoever has been watching out for my brother and that he is as lucky as he is

~ family support is worth it's weight in gold

~ no matter how hard we think our lives are, someone else has it harder

~ a sense of humor makes all the difference

~ amy's friends make the best cookies ever

*sorry, no pictures this post... i'll try to get some for the next one.

On being an American...

I'm not American. 

Derrald is an American.

I am a New Zealander.

However, yesterday, after YEARS of whining about not being welcome in this country, YEARS of watching and waiting as my entire family lived and resided in the land of the "free", YEARS of contingency planning and country hopping and "where will I go next", YEARS of baking the most amazing brownies and chocolate chip cookies (okay, my cookies are terrible, but what could be more American than brownies?!) after YEARS, yesterday, Thursday 9th September 2010,  I was approved and accepted as a Permanent Resident of the United States of America.

It's official! I'm in. I am free to reside here, to work here, to laugh and play and make as many brownies as I like here. 

We made it! All scenarios of "24" style interrogation rooms and torture tactics were laid to rest when a perfectly nice man asked one perfectly nice question (and got an answer longer than he expected) 

"How did you two meet?" 

Well. D and I looked at each other. "Should I start?" "You start" D replied. 

"It was the summer of 1997...."

I should have just handed him over the stack of papers we had printed out OF OUR BLOG and told him to "read for himself".

Where did August go?

I've been getting some pressure lately about not writing on this blog enough. I want to. It's not that I don't. It's just, so many things have been happening recently I have no idea how to blog them coherently, in a way that doesn't get confusing... or over indulgent. Seriously. It's easy to get carried away on these things and I have a journal for that.

So, I'm going to bullet point. I LOVE to bullet point. It's a method of list-making. And I LOVE lists.

Our life in August, by way of bullet-points:

KEY: H = Hayley D = Derrald

• H goes to TAG actors meeting
• H meets with her visiting teachers for the first time
• Seth (our newest family addition) comes to stay for a night (and almost never gets to leave!!)
• D+H are losing weight on WW - trying not to let their hunger irritate them into being monsters 24/7
• H receives her work permit from the US Government
• H flies to Boston to help her sister, Ashley, pack up and move
• Brendan is injured in Afghanistan - the family panic.
• Brendan is flown to Germany for care
• D flies to Utah for Lorien's wedding
• Ashley flies to Sudan to begin a 6month medical placement
• H flies to Utah to meet D
• The Stice ladies plan a surprise bridal shower (afternoon tea) for H
• Ryan's birthday (same day as the bridal shower - talk about selfless!)
• Lorien and Seth's Wedding!
• The babies and Lily go back to school
• Kay Stice receives an award from BYU
• H meets half of Utah in the attempt to better know some of D's friends and family
• We meet baby Kylie (our niece) for the first time
• Brendan is sent back to the US for rehabilitation
• D+H detour their homebound flight to make a stop in Atlanta to spend time with Brendan
• H's dad falls off his horse
• D+H weigh-in and find out all their earlier efforts have been completely negated by the fact that they pounded bundt cake, brownies, shakes, IN&OUT burgers, and other delicious things in a completely uncontrolled fashion for two weeks
• D continues the long battle towards graduation and getting his dissertation done
• H's short film "Finding Marilyn" gets listed on IMDb
• H receives the immigration notice allocating her an interview date for September 9th
• D+H recommit to health, school and living the good (poor) life

I have not added some of the fun details. The juice, if you will. I thought I would revisit some of the points in detail in a future post. If you've seen something here you'd like to hear more about, let me know. If you've seen something here that you wish I'd never mentioned, stay quiet. No one is forcing you to read this.

NO, Derrald. SOME things are NOT meant to be listed in bullet point on the blog. In fact, those things are not meant to be listed in bullet point - ever.

What's a blog post without photos? Snore. That's what. So, even though I failed to take any photos the entire month of August (this makes me SO sad) I am adding a little token eye candy for you.

This was a little "behind the scenes"... I am still going through our wedding photos but I will get them up asap.

From Taraz

I love you too.you are nice. we love haveing Hayley  in are family. we love love.

The Tart of a Lifetime

There is no more amazing experience than to come home to what you see on your screen. This tart caused me to weep when I bit into it and it's identical twin. My wife is a culinary genius. Knowing that it was made "healthy" style made it taste that much more sweet.

Hayley and I have been married now for around four and a half months. We have been having fun discovering the hidden talents of each other. Hayley makes the most delicious soups and desserts I've ever imagined. I organize our belongings and eat the "questionable" food in the fridge. We're a good team.

This tart really did blow my mind.

The Wedding - Part II

Alright. So where were we? On our way to dinner I think.

Fun, colorful tables.

Teke bags from NZ with paua shell and mini kiwi's. Jordan almonds. Cards to write your wishes for the bride and groom. Centerpieces made by Linda Ross with photos of me and Derrald.

Voss water. D thought he was in heaven.

Our wedding cake (on the right) was made by my Grandma with flowers native to New Zealand. It's also worth taking note of the little silver pieces on top of the cake (one is shaped like a horse-shoe) - these were from my Grandmother's cake in 1954. The other cake (on the left) was a pavlova (one, of maybe two hundred, i had been making every night for 10 days before the wedding) , which we made for all the guests to try.

Notice, we cut the pavlova, not the other cake. The other cake will be kept in the freezer until a) our one year anniversary or b) we have our first child...(substantially longer than a year if all goes according to plan, which, let's face, life does NOT always go according to plan... but let's presume this time it will)... then we'll bring it out again, re-ice it and eat it. This is tradition. Whether we like fruit cake or not (derrald).

First Dance.

"Lucky" by Jason Mraz.

Play sample on Pandora

The Cat and the Fish Bag

So, I have recently discovered two distinct ways of drawing attention to one's self and making friends with strangers.

1. Carry your brother's cat across the nation on two connecting flights... turns out people love cats. Love 'em. And they will love you too if you carry one like an accessory. Heavy, meowing accessory.

2. Carry a fish bag.

I have a fish bag. It's a bag with fish on it. I recently brought the fish bag out of storage to take to Hawaii with us. It's a good beach bag. Did I mention it has fish on it?

My fish bag makes me smile. Children love it. They love to point out the fish and this makes me smile. My favorite comment so far was uttered from the mouth of a small child at Southpoint Mall:

"Nemo!! Mommy! Nemo!!"

This child had decided all fish must be called Nemo. Yes, child. Nemo bag.

Forget candy. All one needs to lure a child these days is a fish bag.

The Wedding - Part I

Every time I start talking with Derrald about our wedding day we end up needing an hour or two just to cover the bare minimum of things we loved about this day. Here is my abridged run down of the days events.

Friday, June 18th was a gorgeous, sunny day in Danville, CA. Our friends and family had flown in from all over the country, all over the world!

I was feeling good all glammed up, hair, makeup, dress, shoes, father and bridesmaids assembled, when I was practically pushed out the door. No, I was not late. I really didn't see the need to hurry but some of us were nervous... huh-hum FATHER.

We proceeded on our walk down the street, waving to neighbours, the excitement building, when, as I cleared the bushes to make our final approach on to the lawn where our guests would be waiting... there were NO guests!

(it looked a little something like this:)

Where on earth had our entire wedding party gone and where was the groom?!?!? And why was I being made to hide behind a bush?!? (yes, a bush!) I was told to hide behind a bush, while my sister went off to assess the situation. Turns out, everyone was gathered in the clubhouse.

"Places People!!!"

With everyone in place our ceremony continued with much joy, having both mothers say a word or two of welcome and introduction and Derrald's father leading the ceremony.

My sweet friend, Alyson, serenaded us with a love song and one darling child felt the need to vocalize an opinion, I'm sure many were feeling "I WANT CANDY". Me too, Lily. Me too.

We pushed through (despite the lack of candy), and then something about caring and sharing and always admitting the wife knows best was agreed to, do you - do you, we do, hooray!!

You may kiss the bride.

We hit the clubhouse for some snacks and photographs commenced.

Whilst I could have gone on for hours, by 7pm, with some three thousand (3,000!) photographs taken over the course of two days, we figured we probably had something "useable" ** and we were ready to move on with the days events. Round two. The reception.

Brendan was our designated driver for the day and I would like to take a moment to publicly thank him. Although I would not describe it as "service with a smile"... more like "service with a few short curse words and a little army attitude thrown in" ... we always arrived safely and on time... . ;) Thanks brother. I haven't added any pictures because although he looked truly stunning in his army greens (um, hello show stealer? talk about showing up the bride!) he's very sensitive about the sharing of public images/information. He WAS at the wedding. I assure you. You can take my word for it.

I leave you here, dear readers... (reader)... (alyson)... No cliffhanger. No witty remarks to have you coming back to see how our wedding day concludes. Just a promise that I will eventually get around to the second installment. Please be patient and occasionally share the love by leaving a comment or two...

**note: Jenna was uh-mazing and we'd totally recommend her. Did I mention we tried to pick her up at San Francisco airport when she had arrived at Oakland airport? Yup. Left her waiting for an hour and then told her to catch the train. Derrald booked her tickets. He knew. He forgot. She forgave. We all laughed. Jenna = trooper.